I hear so much about strategy lately and to be honest, I just don't get most of it. I try to understand but my big bunny brain is just too full of nonsense and exaggerated claims. So, in case you're like me I'm going to show you how to fake like you know what your doing.

Stay real close to your buddies. Touch them, look at them, listen to them, and try to do what they do-especially if they act like they know what to do!

Stay tuned-in. This takes uhhm...uhhh...practice. When I'm not taking medication for ADHD it takes even more practice, and forget it if there's something shiney. During league scrimmages and practices I try to avoid any un-derby-related topics. During a bout I could be a victim of spontaneous human combustion and never know.

Talk to yourself, shout at others. Keep a running dialogue of what is happening at all times and shout out the good parts. ("Jammer coming up right behind me, like kind of to the outside- no! Inside! Oh shit, here she's trying it again- outside! I've got the line! You go out! We missed her! Water falling now- I'm going up! She's getting tired and frustrated. Our jammer is ten feet from the pack, five feet!")

Keep your eyes wide open. In practice, it sometimes gets boring to always look behind you. But if you practice this during every drill it will become second nature.

If you're still unsure of what you should be doing try taking a look at my fancy flo-tegery chart below.